Bitter tea

One of the biggest insults that I have had levied against me is to always be such a 'great friend;' it's the male counter part to 'always a bridesmaid, never the bride.'

The world wants me to believe that there is nothing wrong with me, that the 'right' person is out there for me, but I'm beginning to know better.

I am not the right person for anyone, I am the sort of person someone 'sett;es for.

No one desires to be with someone like me.

Instead of calling someone 'just a great friend' the next time around. Tell them the truth; ' you might be a decent human being, but there is absolutely nothing in your soul or being that would compell anyone to ever actually love you. Instead I would rather rely and depend on you and call you when someone else shits all over my life; but the parts of life that living is about, the parts that mean something, you're not worth keeping around.'

Don't worry about 'hurting someone's feelings,' just grow a backbone and say what you really mean. I have had more pacificying slaps in the face that you can count, don't worry about my feeling. I have been less offended by an ex threatening to 'rip my head off' that I have been by the countless number of 'freinds' who thought they were saving my feelings.

I lose!

Per the norm....

Silly silly chromosome...

Ok, I've sucked this month admittedly, but oh well. I have spent much of this month racking my brain for the answer to every guy's biggest question, 'what in the hell is that girl thinking?' And I don't mean that in a deragotory, 'She's loco' sorta way, I mean in in the, 'What in the hell is she thinking?' sorta way. It is both entertaining and frustrating. It's been awhile since I've actually given a shit about what those of the female persuasion think that I am quite rusty at this. Mayhaps I will figure this out this week? Time will only tell.

In other news, I'm quitting all sorts of things. No more coffee, pop, junkfood, sweetened tea or being fucking lazy. It's only been three weeks, but I'm doing damn good so far. Minus the fact that I'm tired on the weekends more often I'm actually doing better during the week while getting less sleep.

Anyway, time to go back to work, and if anyone knows and good games (i.e. worth spending money on) for a PSP let me know, I figure I should own a game or two besides hacking it up some.